


Finding Utopia *on hiatus*

by lumassen



Category: Hetalia: Axis Powers
Genre: Alternate Universe - Dystopia, Disability Discrimination, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Mental Health Issues, Multi, Trigger warnings:, Violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-07-06
Packaged: 2021-03-03 03:40:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 6
Words: 18,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24478096
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lumassen/pseuds/lumassen
Summary: ***ON TEMPORARY HIATUS - this fic involves a heavy re-write on my part and at the moment I don't have the motivation to do it. I have 12 chapters of badly written 1st person content that I wrote when I was 16, so with a heavy heart this story won't be updated for a while as I focus on my other fics. Sorry to anyone who's reading this, but I've been working on this fic on and off for 8 years lol and the time has come for me to leave it alone for a while.***"I ran for my life. I had dared to love another man, and so I was to be killed. Once outside of the walls, it's a completely different world."Berwald is an exile of the city of Utopia, along with Lukas, Emil and Mathias. Tino, the newest outcast, doesn't know the reason for his exile after he finds himself in a strange new place after being snatched away from his life and family. After meeting the people who call themselves the Vikings, Tino starts to discover grim truths about the city he once called home the once he learns why people are exiled in the first place. Though the more he uncovers, the more his own exile just doesn't add up. Could two worlds be on the brink of war because of him? In a world of Magic vs Machine there is much to fear.
Relationships: Denmark/Norway (Hetalia), Finland/Sweden (Hetalia), Hong Kong/Iceland (Hetalia)
Comments: 17
Kudos: 26





	1. Prologue

** Prologue: **

I was to be exiled. 

I knew what they did with people like me. The city is a lie, and anyone who goes against the government is either exiled or taken into custody. Nobody knows what they do to people in there, the place where they hold you. They say that it’s a hospital for the un-well, but anyone who gets admitted is never seen again. If you’re handi-capped, mentally ill, a homosexual, or perhaps someone with learning difficulties, then they’re scared of you and so you’re punished. They hunt you down. On most occasions, they snatch you right from the streets. You disappear without a trace. I’m guessing that this is to avoid suspicion. How would the entirety of the city react of they knew what was going on around them? Unless you yourself have been exiled, you won’t know anything about the dark secrets the city holds. And then once you know, there is no telling, because once you have been transferred over the border, out of Utopia and into the vast, other world beyond, there is no going back. Your very existence is wiped from the data of the world you were once part of. Eventually, anyone who knew you will forget you, whether they want to or not. 

I ran. I ran for my life. I had to. I had dared to love another man, and so I was to be killed. They left me to die. Once outside in the open, it’s a completely different world. The closest village is miles away, a trek through bitter weather, dirt, and a landscape rich with vicious creatures. There is water, there is food. There is life, there is shelter. But you have to find it. I was lucky. I’m strong, I’m healthy, and so I was able to reach the village miles from the great walls of Utopia in which I now reside. But for someone in a wheelchair, or for someone weaker than I, it’s impossible. Myself and a handful of other outcasts have now devoted our existence to help other exiles survive. To find them. To feed them. To care for them. Nobody deserves to die, so I won’t let them. Every day before night-fall, we venture out, back towards Utopia. I always hope that my trip will be pointless, and I return empty handed, because that means that there have been no exiles to pick up that day. We find the occasional body of someone who sadly could not hold on, and sometimes its days before we find any survivors, for they continue to walk in circles, looking for something that can save them, so when we do eventually find them they are weak, limp and lifeless. It’s heart-breaking. But it’s the reality of our world. But it’s our job as human being to protect each other. We call ourselves the Vikings, powerful beings unlike any other. We have our differences, but combined, they make us stronger than those of Utopia. 

And so I, Berwald Oxenstierna, will do all I can to protect the lives of fellow exiles no matter what their reason for exile was. I will do all I can and guard their life with mine.


	2. Chapter One

**Friday 2nd June 2019.  
(Tino Väinämöinen)**

The rain was pouring down heavily. It was a good job that I checked the weather forecast this morning and brought an umbrella. I took it from my satchel, opened it up and set out into the downpour. I had been studying at the library for countless hours and had lost track of time and it was starting to get dark. Mother was going to kill me. I looked up, the gloomy skies matched my mood perfectly, shuddering as a drop of rain rolled off the umbrella and down the back of my neck. I hate this city. I haven’t a clue why, everything just feels wrong, like we’re ahead of our time. Large metal skyscrapers, robots sweeping the streets, holographic cashiers, it’s not right. I’ve heard tales of another world outside of Utopia, with people different to us, but still the same. Human beings. I don’t tell my mother of course, she’ll only worry about me. It’s probably only a silly rumour, but don’t rumours usually stem from something real? It’s a nice place to live, Utopia, don’t get me wrong. The people are friendly and life is well, I just feel as though something is being hidden within this place. My best friend, Eduard, went missing about a year ago. Life hasn’t been the same without him. He just disappeared without a trace, his records, everything. Gone. 

My phone vibrated in my pocket, bursting my thought bubble and bringing me back to reality. Sliding it out of my pocket, I glanced at the caller ID before answering it. It was Elizabeta. 

“Hey, Liz.” I said into the receiver, switching the umbrella to my left hand and placing the phone at my ear. 

“Heya Tino. Just wanted to check you’re alright? You’ve seemed pretty out of it all day. I was going to come and find you after class but you’d already left by the time I was dismissed.” She spoke pretty quickly, and I felt touched that she was concerned about me.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Just having one of those days…” I said honestly, cringing as I stood in a deep puddle and the water soaked through my shoes.

She tutted in response. “You can tell me if something’s wrong you know. You’ve not been yourself lately. Is everything alright at home?”

“Yeah yeah, everything’s fine. Mom’s just as bubbly as ever,” I laughed a little at the thought of my mother, she and I were like two peas in a pod.

“Oh, speaking of my mother, I forgot to ask you yesterday, she invited you round for dinner on Sunday. She’s making that grilled salmon dish that you like. Wanna come and hang out?”

“Of course! I have a few questions to ask you too actually about the Math homework that’s due in next week. Should I bring my notes over?” 

“Sure, I’d be happy to help.” I felt myself smiling a little now, Elizabeta always found a way to cheer me up, even if it wasn’t intentional.

“Okay, great. I’ll see you Sunday.” She said before hanging up.

I shoved my phone back into my pocket. The rain was starting to come down even heavier now, so I decided to quicken my pace.

*

I arrived home no less than ten minutes later, but to find my house completely dark. I took the key out of my pocket and turned it in the lock, but it was already unlocked. Weird, Mom never left the front door unlocked, no matter how safe and free of crime they told us Utopia was. Opening the door slightly I stuck my head inside, now too petrified to even step into my own house. A chill ran down my spine as I spotted two figures standing at the end of my hallway. They were whispering quietly amongst themselves. I wasn’t sure if they were ignoring me, or if they hadn’t noticed me. I held my breath and snuck back outside and back down my garden path when suddenly a pair of gloved hands covered my face from behind. The leather was cold and tight on my face, so tight that I could hardly breathe. I tried to kick and scream, hoping to either free myself from the harsh grip of my captor or attract attention from anyone passing by. But their grip was too strong. I felt a sharp pain shoot through my neck, and my back arched as I writhed in pain, unable to soothe the burning pain that was pulsing through my body, then, everything went black.

\-------------------

When I awoke, there were no words to describe how I felt. I lay amongst tall grass, looking up at a clear blue sky, all trace of the storm had disappeared as if it were a brand new day. A gentle breeze blew across my face, blowing my hair against my face lightly, tickling me. I sat up slowly. Pain was the last thing I could remember, and it was dully re-entering my neck when I moved. I blinked a few times, hoping that it would help my eyes to adjust to the harsh, bright light of the sun. Fields of grass – real grass - stretched for miles in every direction, the stretched all the way to the distant blue mountains that connected the land to the sky. Where was I?

Suddenly, I heard a terrible screeching sound come from behind me. Naturally, I whipped my head around to see if I could locate where the sound was coming from, but then quickly ducked down. A huge, scaled, bird-like creature like nothing I had ever seen before swooped over my head, its talons barley missing me by half an inch. Despite my aching body, I picked myself up and ran. I didn’t know where I was running to, or where I was going to hide, everywhere around me was open field! Daring to take a quick glance over my shoulder, I spotted the creature heading towards me at great speed. I ducked again as it dived for me, throwing myself to the ground, but this time the monster managed to catch my arm, tearing my clothing and leaving a huge gash across my shoulder blade. I cried out in pain and clutched my shoulder, trying my best to get up again, but my body just wouldn’t move. My legs burned from running and my neck throbbed, sending what felt like electricity sizzling through my nerves. 

Was I going to die? Was that creature going to eat me? _Where the hell was I?_ I tried to tell myself that this was all just a nightmare, and I would wake up any minute, but the searing pain shooting through my arm confirmed that I was well and truly awake.

Out of the corner or my eye, I saw the creature approaching once again. Crouching down into the grass I screwed my eyes shut, tears escaping and rolling down my cheeks, and prepared myself for the impact, but it never came. Instead I heard the distinct sound of the gallop of horses’ hooves and a loud ‘thump’ as something heavy hit the ground. Everything had gone quiet. Staying with my head pressed to my knees and just listening for any sound of movement, but I could no longer hear the hooves of the horse, or the beating sound of the creature’s wings; just my own ragged breathing.

“Var är du? Rop hvis du kan høre meg!”*

A voice suddenly broke the silence, calling out in a language I didn’t understand. 

“Gutt! Svara meg!” they called out again, this time though they sounded as if they were approaching nearer and nearer.

“Hello? Ah- I’m over here!” I shouted back hoping that they would understand, finally daring to move. I tried my best to get up, but the overwhelming pain in my body would not allow it. The footsteps picked up their pace, as if they had begun running, then someone suddenly threw themselves onto their knees next to me. Squinting up at them, I noticed that it was a young man, not much older than myself by the looks of it. He had soft looking, light blonde hair, one side falling over his face as he leaned over me, the other tucked neatly behind his ear, held in place by a single pin in the shape of a cross.

“Exile.” He said. It seemed more like an answer than a question, like he was confirming something to himself. 

“You’re hurt. Can you stand?” his words were very blunt and to the point, but I wasn’t complaining. At least he wasn’t messing around when he could see I was in pain. I shook my head. Unexpectedly, he slid his arms under my back and lifted me up. I instantly tensed up, not quite knowing what to do. This boy was much stronger than he looked! He lifted me onto the back of the horse that I heard earlier and forced my feet into the stirrups. I obeyed his actions and didn’t question him, I was in too much of a bewildering pain and he was doing a kind thing, rescuing me. Had he killed that monster? He swung himself up onto the horse and sat infront of me. 

“Hold on as tight as you can. Wrap your good arm around my waist. You’re safe now.”

I nodded, but was I really safe? I was on this back of a horse, in a clearly foreign land with a strange boy who had just slayed a terrifying creature. A lump formed in my throat but I forced myself to swallow it and hung on tight as the boy snapped the reigns.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *the language in this fic is a jumble of Swedish, Danish and Norwegian in an attempt to sort of create an old norse sounding language. It said 'where are you? Shout if you can hear me!' 'Boy! Answer me!'
> 
> Now that's out of the way, welcome! I published this fic a long time ago on FFN.net, but like Make an Icon out of me I've decided to edit it and bring it over to AO3. I was 15 when I started writing this, and now I'm 23 so it's been a hot minute. My writing has obviously matured and so has my ability to write a more in depth character and not just go off common traits like 'Berwald talks in broken English all the time' or 'Lukas is a monotone abusive character' like I was guilty of doing previously. I'm going to edit, re-write and post each chapter at a time, and then write the rest and complete the story. 
> 
> Please add comments for either constructive criticism or feedback when and where you can, as this fic (as well as ICON) is practice for me as a writer, especially as I'd love to publish something original as an author some day. I'm not one for 1st person writing usually so hopefully this reads okay. Please let me know if not and I may switch to 3rd.
> 
> I hope you enjoy! - lumassen x


	3. Chapter Two

Chapter two:

I hung on as tight as I could as we rode through the vast fields of green, but I could feel myself slipping in and out of consciousness as blood continued to seep through my clothing. The horse had really picked up speed now and the wind whipped through my hair and whistled past my ears. It was nauseating. It felt like we had been traveling for a very long time. The boy that I hung onto hadn’t said a single word to me, he just rode the horse rather expertly. I had only even seen pictures and videos of horses, and had never thought that I would ever see one, let alone find myself on the back of one. We were traveling at great speed, yet it was still a comfortable ride considering. I had expected it to be worse. Riding seemed to come natural to the boy, like he’d been riding for years. He smelt like earth, like the forest. 

Suddenly, the terrain changed and we slowed down considerably. I sat up quickly when I heard the horses’ hooves switch from riding across grass and field to some sort of road made from pebbles. We were now in a village, a small town like no-where I had ever seen before, not even in a picture. How had I not noticed this in the distance? The buildings were made from wood, stone and plaster, with small wooden shutters framing the windows. Houses were built into the hillside, intertwined among magnificent roots belonging to trees reaching almost above the clouds. The air was thick with all kinds of different smells, some sweet, like freshly baked bread, and some foul, like the sewer. People stared as we rode past, though some nodding or waving to the boy infront of me, whose name I had yet to discover, but he ignored them. We carried on riding, past the busy streets filled with people, horse and wagons and shops, and out into another vast open space. But this time there was no green grass, just dusty, mountainous terrain with dead tree stumps and wilted plants all around us. I screwed up my face and buried it into the boys back in an attempt to keep the dust that rose from below from scratching my eyes. Then we finally stopped. In the ground were stone steps leading underground. 

“Wait here.” The blonde boy instructed as he dismounted the horse and tied the reigns to a wooden stump. Then he disappeared down the steps and vanished into the darkness. I strained my ears trying to listen for any sounds, anything at all, but once the pitter-patter of his feet on the steps faded away, all was quiet. I lay down on the horses back, clinging onto it by slipping my good arm around its belly, breathing in its warm scent, my mind buzzing. I couldn’t stop thinking about the state I had found my house in. Who were those people and what had they done with my mother? What had they done with me? 

“-so useless, Lukas! You could have at least tied it with something and applied pressure to ease and stop the bleeding. We’re starting to run out of spare cloth as it is; now we have to fork out some more for bandages? You know Emil hasn’t had time to go to the drop off yet…” I heard a voice begin to float up from the depths where the blonde boy had disappeared to.

“What was I supposed to use? I had nothing with me but my weapon. I was out hunting, not searching for exiles. They don’t usually dump until nightfall, d’ya not think this is weird? I couldn’t just leave him. Besides, it’s not my groups turn tonight anyway, it’s yours.”

The muffled voices began to get clearer and clearer as two people emerged from the darkness below. The shorter of the two who had saved me just now, whose name I figured was Lukas as he was being addressed by the other. He was much taller than Lukas, with strawberry blonde, wild hair. He wore a burgundy coloured tunic over brown baggy trousers tucked into clothed boots, leather lacing wound around them, binding them to his feet. They didn’t look at all comfortable. It was now that I realised just how odd the clothes that they wore were. I was in too much of a daze earlier to realise what Lukas was wearing, but now that I was properly focused I noticed that his clothes were very similar to the taller boy he stood next to, only his tunic was navy blue and his trousers were black and nowhere near as baggy. On his feet were tan coloured boots, also wound by leather lacing. Myself, on the other hand, wore what any normal teenager would wear. Skinny jeans, sneakers, a long sleeved white t-shirt and a hoodie, my favourite one in fact, now ruined; covered in blood, dust, rips and tears. 

“Hey there, it’s ok. You’re safe now. Lukas told me what a close call you had with that Sky Monster. Come, we’ll clean that wound and get you some fresh clothes. My name is Mathias by the way.” The taller of the two said as he approached me, and began to slide me off of the horse and into his arms. He spoke to me in a calm, hushed tone, as if I were a small child. My mind was racing, still in shock and trying to work out of this was actually happening so I didn’t question anything and I let him carry me down the steps, Lukas following close behind. The steps led down into a tunnel, and the walls were damp and dripping, though torches burned brightly from heavy metal holders along the wall, illuminating the pathway. Many large wooden doors also lined the walls. When we stopped in front of one, Lukas stepped past Mathias and heaved it open. It swung open with a creak and we were greeted by a warm, cosy room. Rows and rows of books lined the walls, along with shelves full of little colourful glass bottles. 

“Mathias, you can put him down. He can still walk you know. He’s going to have to toughen up, so why not start now?” Lukas said as he approached a large wooden chest. He unlatched it and heaved it open, diving inside and pulling out several pieces of cloth. 

“Oh. Yeah, Sorry.” He laughed lightly and gently let me down. I stepped gingerly onto the stone floor. I looked around, unsure of what to do with myself. 

“Make yourself useful will you, and go fetch the soap and water please?” Lukas again shot a command at Mathias, still with his back turned. Mathias simply nodded and left the room quietly, closing the door behind him. I shifted uncomfortably on the spot when he glanced at me from the corner of his eye as he began to lay the cloth out on a table. He sighed softly,

“You can come here you know. I know this it’s a strange feeling, suddenly waking up in this place. But we’ve all been through it. You’re not alone.” He pulled out a wooden chair from underneath the table where he laid out the cloth and motioned for me to take a seat, “Mathias will be back with the soap and water to clean your wound any second now. I’m going to need to remove your clothing so I can get to it.”

I felt myself heat up a little in embarrassment, but it was the only way I was going to sort this mess out. So I simply nodded, and he gave me a faint smile. He took hold of a pair of heavy looking metal scissors and began to cut through my shirt and jacket. I was grateful that he chose to do it this way and not try and pry off my clothing by moving my shoulder out of the sleeves, which would no doubt cause me immense pain.

“So, now that we’ve finally calmed down. What’s your name?” Lukas asked as he worked.

“My name is Tino.”

“And what was your reason for exile, Tino?”

“My what?” 

He paused what he was doing and looked me directly in the eyes. “The reason you were left out here. What did you do that they didn’t like?”

“I… I don’t know what you mean. I never did anything bad. I just remember going home to an empty house, I couldn’t find my mother, so I left my house not knowing what to do, and suddenly I got snatched from behind.” I said, feeling my heartbeat quicken at just the thought. “I can’t remember anything after that. I just woke up here.”  
His eyes softened a little and he gave me an almost pitiful look. 

“Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who doesn’t know why they’re here. I know you’d rather know, but at the end of the day it doesn’t matter, you’re here regardless.” 

Lukas had become closer to my wound now, and was now peeling the strips of fabric from what was once my t-shirt from the dried blood on my skin. I drew in a quick breath as he then quickly ripped it from my body, like my mom would rip off a band-aid. 

“Ouch! That stings…”

A laugh filled the room as Mathias entered with a large wooden bowl filled with warm, soapy water. “If you thought that stung, you haven’t had soap in a wound before. That stings.” He said, setting the bowl down on the table beside Lukas, who began to soak a rag in the water. After about a minute or so, Lukas squeezed it out a little and brought it to my wound. 

“Ahhh FUCK!” I cursed and writhed around as Lukas pressed down the cloth firmly.

“I told ya.” Mathias flashed a cocky grin and pulled up another chair next to me, straddling it backwards and resting his chin on the back of it. To take my mind off of the burning pain of the wound, I decided to follow up on what Lukas asked me earlier.

“So, is there no going back? To Utopia I mean? You two were exiled too, right?”

“Yes there is no going back. This is your home now.” Lukas answered me very quickly, almost avoiding the second part of my question.  
“But what about my mother, my friends?” 

Was I never to see them again? I don’t think I could live knowing that I never got to say a proper goodbye, and I didn’t even know if my mother was safe.

“Forget about them. They’ll only tie you to the past. Forget them all. It’s easier said than done I know, but trust me.” Mathias said as he placed his hand on my arm in sympathy. I bowed my head as tears escaped and rolled down my cheeks. I didn’t want to be here with these people. I would rather have been killed by that creature than have survived and have to live out here, away from everyone and everything I had ever loved.

“But why? Where even am I? I thought tha-” I snivelled, unable to contain my sadness any longer.

“Shhh. Enough questions. Mathias is right, but this will take time for you.” Lukas cooed, interrupting me.

I felt Mathias give my arm a little squeeze, and Lukas removed the cloth from my wound. The bleeding had completely stopped now, and all that was left was a large, clean gaping gash in my skin. It made me feel sick to look at it, so I turned away. Lukas wrapped it up in cloth and secured it tightly, like a bandage. The cloth he used didn’t look very clean, but it was kind of him to treat me like he did, even when he stated earlier that there was a shortage of cloth.

“There. Good as new.” Mathias beamed from his position next to me.

“Can you move it?” Lukas asked gingerly.

I shrugged my shoulder lightly, but winced. I could move it, but it was painful alright.

Lukas nodded in approval. “Now stand. I’ll fix you some new clothes.”

\-----

It took a while, a lot of measuring, snipping and sewing, but finally Lukas was finally done and I stood infront of a tall mirror. I peered into the mirror and hardly recognised myself. I was dressed in similar clothes to Mathias and Lukas, but my cloth tunic was light blue. The shoes that bound my feet weren’t as uncomfortable as I thought. The leather and cloth felt extremely cool and smooth on my feet, and were oddly supporting too. I couldn’t feel the hard ground beneath me like I thought I would be able to.  
Back in Utopia, nobody was creative or made anything unless they had to, but even then it was only assembling flat pack furniture or following a recipe with pre-measured ingredients for convenience. Someone had always already done half the work for you, so it was truly amazing that all of this was made by hand. Lukas truly was skilled. I couldn’t help but wonder how long Lukas had been doing this for, and if everyone here knew how to sew as he mustn’t be much older than me. I wondered what he was exiled for, if there was any reason at all.

“Well. I’d best be going. It’s almost sun-down.” Mathias stretched and stood up, walking over to a tall cupboard in the corner of the room. He opened it and pulled out some thick leather gloves, a pair of brown boots and belt with all kinds of pouches and tools hanging from it. I watched as he geared himself up before passing Lukas and me.

“Håll dig säker. Kan turen bli en verdig en.” (Stay safe. I hope you trip is a worthy one.) Lukas said to him as he left the room.

“Takk. Det håber jeg också.” (Thank you. I hope so too.)

My ears sang at hearing them speak in their language and I couldn’t believe that the rumours were true. There were other humans outside of Utopia, just like us yet different. By the way they had been described, they were made out to sound like monsters who were dangerous and not like us at all. But standing here in front of them, it had all been a lie. It was terrifying to think what else of what I was taught may have been a lie.

“So. I suppose I’d better tell you about village life.” Lukas addressed me, removing me from my thoughts. “There are some things you should know…”

I listened carefully as he explained where I was to go and where I wasn’t. I felt like a small child being told about street smarts. Although I was missing home, I grew more and more interested with this place as Lukas continued. I discovered that where we were was called Menetti Village, and was home to exiles of Utopia. Although the village in itself was safe, I was told not to stray outside of the village gates alone. 

“So where was Mathias going then? You seemed concerned about him when he left.”

Lukas’ expression softened considerably,

“We call ourselves the Vikings. There are several of us. Our job is to rescue people who were in your situation today. It’s Mathias’s groups turn today to search for exiles. Each night just before sundown is when we go, and bring anyone we find back here to recover. Like what we did with you.”

“That’s so brave of you. And such a kind thing to do.” I was touched by how brave these people were. After seeing what kind of creatures were out there, I could never risk my life and face them!

“But you can’t live here,” Lukas continued, “In the village there is a list on the notice board of vacant huts. Sign up for whichever one you like. It’ll be your new home.”

Part of me was anxious to go and explore the village. There seemed like so much to see, so many people to meet. But settling in here all sounded too easy, too simple, and the ache in my chest from missing home already hung heavy on my conscience. 

“What are you standing around for? Go.” Lukas shooed me out of the room and back into the tunnel. 

“But-”

He exhaled an exasperated sigh, “Tino, please. We need to clear everyone out of here for when Mathias and his group returns. Go, you’ll be fine.”

My stomach churned, but I made my way back up the steps. Just as I reached the top I turned back hesitantly, but to find that Lukas was no longer in sight. I was a little mad at him for just sending me off on my own in a place that was basically a whole new world for me. Houses made from stone, straw and plaster, built among gigantic tree roots, strange pebbled roads, the people, the clothes, it was enough to drive someone mad when just thrown into it.

I emerged from the underground passage and strode back over the dusty land, following a small trail marked into the ground left by the hooves of horses and towards the village. Voices grew louder and louder as I approached, and within a few minutes I was standing by a fence on the outskirts of the busy little town. 

“God kveld! Come and get a loaf! The last of today’s batch! Get your loaves here!” 

A man turned to me, holding a basket of bread. 

“Good Sir! How many would you like to buy?”

I turned to look over my shoulder to see if I was the one being spoken to, but failed to see anyone else. The man began to approach me. He had shoulder length blonde hair, tied in a ponytail, draped over one shoulder with a blue ribbon. His clothes were simple, but elegant. He wore a light, cream coloured flowing shirt, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, over brown dress pants and a floury apron over the top.

“Are you okay there? I’ve not seen you around before.”

He appeared to have genuine concern on his face as he spoke, but he still kept a kind expression. 

“Oh, yes, I’m just fine. You won’t have seen me. I just got here. Sorry, I would love to try your bread, but I have nothing to pay you with.” I said with a reluctant shrug.

He tutted and shook his head, out of pity, or the fact that I had no money though, I couldn’t tell.

“A new exile? Such a shame. Here, take this. This one’s on me. My name’s Francis, proud owner of Bonnefoy Bakery.” He said with a grin, handing me a stick of bread. At first, I didn’t take it, I didn’t want charity, but he pressed it into my hands. 

“T-Thank you very much, Sir. I appreciate it. My name’s Tino.” I smiled back, elated at his kindness. 

“Not a problem, I-”

“Francis! The lovely lady here would like some bread!” a voice called out from the crowd, and Francis stopped in mid-sentence to turn and locate where it was coming from. Another blonde man was calling over to Francis, a woman stood by his side. He too was also wearing an apron, but with odd black smudges and burns across the front of it. His hair was a little darker, and didn’t seem to follow any particular style. Dark eyebrows outlined his eyes, which were narrowed in Francis’ direction. 

“Well, duty calls! See you, darling!” And before I could even reply, he was gone, back into the crowd of people. 

Holding my bread under my good arm I had now gained a little more confidence and began to walk around what seemed to be the main village square. Right in the centre there was a large, round water fountain. Children sat around the edges and splashed a little in the water. Various traders wandered around, calling out and advertising their wares. I could see people selling fruit and vegetables, pastries, and even someone with a basket full of fish. Hunger was clawing at my stomach so I took a bite from my bread as I walked, taking in everything that was going on around me while trying to look out for the notice board that Lukas had told me about. All I could see were streets and streets heading off in all sorts of directions though, lined with hundreds of houses, buildings, and market stalls.

Everything seemed so happy, so busy. I was used to living in a world full of harsh, strict rules, always under a watchful eye. Here I stood out, of course unable to adapt to my new surroundings right away. I slumped down on the edge of the fountain and sighed heavily. It seemed as though every time I asked a question, I never seemed to get an answer. Why did everyone keep talking about exiles? What the fuck is an exile? I couldn’t help it, the tears started to flow again. Pressing my hands over my face, I tried to cover myself up. I was so embarrassed and so scared, my own emotions overwhelming me. Whenever I saw something interesting, I would think about how my mother would love to see this, which brought me back to the reality that she was no longer with me, which made my hate myself for enjoying something or even just smiling. 

“Hey, Mister. Are you okay?” I felt someone tugging at my sleeve and I looked up, taking my hands from my face and resting them in my lap, to see a young boy sat next to me on the wall of the fountain. His big, blue eyes gazed up at me, a look of concern etched onto his little round face. 

“C’mon, you can’t be sad. What’s wrong?”

I shook my head and laughed a little at his naivety. 

“I’m just having a strange day... don’t worry about me.” I said as I wiped my eyes on my sleeve.

He looked down at the ground for a moment, his legs swinging, nowhere near the ground. His clothes were a little worn, and his face and hair were dirty. He must have been about eight or nine at the most, yet here he was, concerned about the well-being of others. A complete stranger even. Suddenly, music began to play and he looked up quickly, a large smile now covering his face. Jumping down from the wall he took hold of my hands and pulled me up.

“Roderich and his musicians are about to start playing, come and dance with me, Mister!”

Now I couldn’t help but smile as the small boy pulled me along, following the sound of the music. It was a beautiful combination of drumming, violins and some strange instruments that I didn’t recognise, the beat quick and cheerful. People began clapping along and dancing in pairs, arms linked together and feet tapping and stomping in synchronisation. It was truly amazing how everyone came together so quickly. The little blonde boy spun around in front of me, laughing and giggling and waving to a few of his friends. The beat got faster, and more people began to join in. Suddenly, someone linked their arms with mine and pulled me away from the boy. She danced with me for a few moments, grinning and laughing wildly before passing me on again. Looking around, I saw that everyone was doing this. The music got faster and faster, and I got passed around faster too, unsure of how to excuse myself and break away. Then once passed again, I found myself in the arms of a very tall and stoic looking man. I jumped when I saw his face; he seemed to be just as shocked at having his arm linked with mine than I was. 

We spun around a little awkwardly, and then the music came to an end and I hurried to let go of him. I stuttered a flustered apology and fidgeted under his gaze.

“Don’t apologise. I didn’t expect Peter t’ drag me into that.” He said, shaking his head as the boy who’d approached me before the music started came bounding over, 

“Berwald! Did you see that? That was amazing! I did good, didn’t I?” he cried excitedly, tugging at the mans’ - Berwald’s - trouser leg. Berwald reached down and ruffled his hair, giving a simple nod. “Yeah, Peter, you were good.”

“You did good too! And you stopped crying!” he turned to address me, and true, I had stopped crying. I had forgotten all about being unhappy for a brief moment.

“You were cryin’? ‘Bout what?” Berwald asked bluntly.

“It’s nothing, really.” I shrugged it off, not wanting to bother anyone with my whining, especially a stranger I had only just been acquainted with. 

“You’re new here?”

I sighed at the same question being asked for the second time, “Yeah, I am.”

“You found a place to live yet? A job?” Berwald fired yet another question at me.

“No to both of those questions. I’m not having a very good day if I’m honest.”

All was silent for a few moments before Peter took hold of my hand again.

“Come with us, we will show you a house where you can live!”

I looked up and glanced at Berwald, unsure of what to do. To my surprise, he nodded and began to walk away, Peter tugging me to follow.  
We turned down one of the little side streets, passing merchants and stalls on the way. Tall houses towered over us in the narrow alleyway, and when I looked up I could see clothes on washing lines hanging from one window to another and all sorts of colourful flags hanging from window sills. Peter now skipped happily infront, Berwald loping close behind him, and then there was me on their trail.

We hadn’t walked for long at all before we emerged into a clearing and I found myself surrounded by a circle of small little huts, all facing each other. Each was made from wood and plaster, with a little thatched roof. They were a lot more down scale than the ones we had passed in the village square. Although they all looked the same, each was different in its own way, and just by looking at the house you could tell what sort of person lived there. For example, smoke poured from the chimney of one house, soft music came from inside and there was all sorts of strange symbols carved into the wooden door. 

Berwald and Peter glanced over their shoulder, probably to check if I was still following, before leading me to the front door of a house. They stopped outside of it. Peter gave me a thumbs up, and Berwald nodded towards the door. Pushing it open gently, I was met with a cosy little living room. It was barely furnished, and so different from my house back home. Well, I couldn’t call it home anymore.

As I stepped inside, to my surprise, there was a fitted kitchen, with a sink and even a beat up refrigerator. A small room off to the back, where I could only guess that’s where the bathroom was. It wasn’t much, but now it was home.

“It’s vacant if you wanna take it. First month’s rent is free because you’re a new exile. You can get furniture over time an’ make it your own. Me an’ Peter live just a few huts down. So come by if you need anything.” Berwald said as he hung around in the doorway.

I looked at him for a moment, trying to figure out if he was being serious. Surely it can’t have been this easy to find a place to live out here? But he stood there expectantly, probably waiting for a reply or reaction from me. Of course I still had to ask about finding a job, but there was always tomorrow for that. Right now, I just wanted sleep.

“Thank you, Berwald. I appreciate this so much.”

He nodded and began to close the door when Peter stuck his foot in.

“Hey, Mister! Will you visit us tomorrow?”

My stomach churned at such a simple and innocent question, as it confirmed to me that I was well and truly away from everything I had ever know, and I didn’t know why. I would wake up tomorrow and still be here in this new world where I knew nobody and nobody knew me. 

Berwald was beginning to usher a protesting Peter out of the door, clearly not expecting a reply from me as I took a breath, having nothing to lose,

“Of course I will.”


	4. Chapter Three

Chapter three:

"You want to know 'bout me?" Berwald asked, his brows raised in surprise. He shot me a glance before returning his attention to the boiling pot of water on the stove, towering over the appliance. 

I had woken up early after tossing and turning all night, unable to sleep. It was stuffy and the air was clammy in the hut, and the bed sheets were extremely itchy. Not knowing what else to do with my morning, I'd paid a visit to Berwald and Peter like I said I would. Their home was quite the opposite of mine, despite looking identical from the outside. It was widely furnished, and very homely. Rugs covered the hard, stone floor, and the walls were covered in paintings, drawings and charts. I sat at the large wooden table in the centre and sipped some kind of herbal tea from a mug that Berwald had given to me. He welcomed me into his home like we had known each other for years.

He bustled around in the little kitchen area for a while before coming to sit down with me at the table, setting down his own mug. The two of us talked quietly, as Berwald had told me that Peter was still sleeping in the next room.

"Yes, I want to know how you ended up here. Why do you sound so surprised?" I said, tracing the swirls of the wooden table with my finger.

He paused to take a large mouthful of tea before replying,

"Not many people are interested in knowin' 'bout me." He shrugged.

I leaned forward, resting my chin in my hands and gazing at him, urging him to continue. He fidgeted and averted my gaze, but then sighed,

"I was exiled 'cause the person I was datin' was another man."

"Wait, what? You mean you're gay? I didn't think people could actually feel that way about the same gender, love them, I mean, and that it was just a rumour." I said, and it was true. In Utopia, men loved women and vice versa and that's just the way it was. 

He nodded slowly and laughed bitterly. "Yeah, that's cause they get rid of us."

"Berwald, I… I don't know what to say. That's awful. You were taken away from your friends and family just because of who you loved. I'm sorry."

"It's ok. I accept it now. This is the way things are. People've been exiled for worse reasons."

I felt my heart breaking at the sadness in his voice as he spoke. I couldn't help but wonder what happened to his partner, but I didn't dare ask. It was none of my business and he probably didn't want to talk about it too much.

"What happened to you? How did you end up here?" I asked, trying to change the subject a little despite still wanting to know more.

"I was taken by the government. Don't know how they found out about who I was datin', but they did and just took me. It was like a hospital. They do tests. I was like a guinea pig, and once they were done with me, I ended up 'ere." He finished with a shrug, setting his mug down and staring into the honey coloured liquid.

I always knew something went on behind closed doors in that place, but I never imagined it to be as bad as that.

"And so… How long have you been here?"

He shrugged. "'Bout seven years."

Seven years. It seemed to not phase him. Being here that long though must have changed his opinion about a lot of things and perhaps altered his way of thinking. It was a lot different out here. I was starting to think that it was possibly better than back in Utopia. Out here you were truly free to be who you were. What I couldn't wrap my head around is that you couldn't be who you were in Utopia. What were they so afraid of?

"Do you ever miss your old life?" I asked, then took a sip of tea, watching Berwald over the rim.

There was quite a long pause this time before Berwald replied and I began to regret asking that question.

"No. I don't." his reply came as a surprise to me.

"You... you don't?"

"No. Now that I'm here I realised that this is the real Utopia. Free to do whatever we want to do. Here I can actually say that I'm happy. I never had friends back in Utopia because I was too terrified that they would find out who I really was."

He was avoiding eye contact with me as he continued, and picked at a hardened callous of skin around his thumbnail.

"Take Peter fer example. He was left out here when he was only 'bout four years old. Nobody knows how old he really is. We all say he's 'bout seven, but that's not the point. He was left out here to die because of some stupid reason that nobody knows either." He clenched his fist and could have bored a hole into the wooden table with his intense gaze as he kept his head down.

"I don't know why the government of Utopia does what they do, or who's behind it all, but out 'ere is how people should be living life. We get by on what we have. Not everyone is happy. But I prefer life out here. I wish I had grown up here all of my life. I hope ya understand what I'm trying to explain to you..."

He began to get a bit flustered and red-faced, but that was understandable. That was the most I had heard him speak, and I could tell that he wasn't really used to speaking to people at length. As hard as this information was to understand, I felt a little comforted knowing that I was not the only one who didn't know why they were exiled at least.

I could see though that the conversation was beginning to touch on a touchy subject, so I decided it was enough on that topic for now. Looking around I noticed a lack of all things electrical; save from the refrigerator. It was strange… they clearly had an electricity supply, how else would the fridge be running? Yet I failed to see something such as a television set or a radio.

"So then, what do you guys do for fun around here? I can't see a TV or anything…"

"No signal out 'ere." Berwald said.

"Oh." Is all I could bring myself to say, then downed the rest of my tea.

"But c'mon. I'll show ya."

Berwald stood up from the table picking up his mug, also gulping down the last few drops quickly before gesturing to collect mine also. I handed it to him and he placed them in the basin gently, letting water from the pump in the wall trickle out and run over them. Leaving them to soak in the water, he then made his way over to the door and slid on a pair of tall leather boots.

Today his clothing was a lot different than it was yesterday. Instead of his tunic and long cloak, he was wearing a low cut cloth shirt tied together loosely with string, like you would see shoelaces on a shoe, and thick navy trousers which he tucked into his boots. I on the other hand was still wearing yesterday's clothing, having slept in them too. I felt rather unclean, but what else was I supposed to do? This was the only outfit I had now.

"We should get ya some clothes too. We don't wear tunics all the time, apart from if we're training if we need to be itentified." Berwald said suddenly, as if he read my mind. He looked my way, his eyes creasing a little behind his glasses and his mouth curled into a soft smile. I hadn't seen his smile yet, and to be honest I was under the impression that I wasn't really going to. But there it was.

I smiled back, but then suddenly remembered about Peter sleeping in the other room. "What about Peter? Shouldn't we take him with us?"

"He'll be fine. He insists he doesn't need me t' take care of him. So I let 'im prove it t' me sometimes." Berwald simply replied as he stood up. "There's some tea in the pot fer him."

One would think Peter was his own son by the way that Berwald cared for him. Though it was a little odd for him to be left alone as such a young age, he was probably used to fending for himself out here. He was, after all, an exile just like everyone else.

Deciding it was best not to challenge Berwald about it, I stood and followed him out of the door, gently closing it behind me.

\---------

By the time we'd made it around the village my feet were beginning to ache, but I was amazed by the amount that there was to do out here. We had been walking around for what must have been well over an hour, and Berwald had practically taken me everywhere that there was to go. He seemed to enjoy explaining what things were to me, and doing his best to answer any question I might have.

The best thing that he showed me was something called Archery, it was a game but could also be used as a defence skill. We stood in wooden stalls surrounding a large arena and watched as people stood and shot sharp sticks called arrows at a target on a sack of hay. Many people watched in the stalls with us, but they weren't watching just archery. There were other things going on too. Berwald explained to me that this was the training grounds, and people came here to learn how to defend themselves against the monsters and creatures that roamed these lands. They also learnt to hunt and make things.

"I train here often with the other Vikings." Berwald informed me as we lingered in the stalls, waiting for the person we were watching to take her shot. Several people around us cheered when her arrow flew through the air and struck the middle of the target.

"I'd love to see you train one day, Berwald. Maybe I could try too!" I added my last part in high hopes of getting my hands on a bow and arrow, or perhaps another type of weapon, like a sword or a dagger. Either way, I wanted in.

He scoffed a little, but didn't outright refuse. He simply nodded.

"Yeah. Ready to go?"

"Go? Where? What else is there left to see?" I laughed a little in disbelief that there was still more left to see. I had already seen the Tavern, the Training grounds, the Bakery, the Markets, the Tailors and many more places. I got fitted for three new outfits while we were in the tailors, which Berwald kindly bought for me. I was over the moon and couldn't find words to express my appreciation. I promised to repay him as soon as I found myself a job and got some money of my own pocketed. He also showed me the currency that they used here. It was a lot different than the currency used back in Utopia. The coins were pretty though, even if they were quite heavy and chunky. They were called Kroner, and were circular in shape with a hole in the middle.

"Jus' this one last place." He said as we began to edge through the crowd and out of the stalls.

Once out of the arena and back onto the street, I couldn't help but wonder why we were going back the way that we had came from.

"Berwald, haven't we already been down this way?"

"Yeah." Came his only reply. Sighing I quickened my pace to match is, then stopped suddenly when we had reached our destination. Berwald had turned down a small little side street, and almost immediately we came to the most wonderful shop I had ever seen.

The outside was made from sandy coloured stones with vines and plants running along the front of it, intertwining with the cracks and framework. Little green shutters outlined the top two windows, while the bottom covered almost the front of the shop. Rows and rows of glass jars filled the window, complimented by a colourful background of draped cloths and material. The jars looked to be filled with beads of glass, ranging greatly in colour, shape and size.

"Saved the best for last." Berwald said as he entered the shop, a bell tinkling overhead as he opened the door. I noticed that the sign above the door read "Lilli's Confectionary". I followed him in and to my amazement I was greeted with more colour than I could ever imagine, and the most wonderful smell. Shelves covered the walls like bookshelves in a library and reached all the way up to the ceiling. A ladder leaned against the far wall, most probably used to reach the jars way out of reach. There was easily way over one hundred jars just along one wall alone. At the back of the shop was a counter cluttered with yet more things, and Two boys leaned over it, chatting idly.

"Berwald, this is amazing! What are all these things in the jars? It smells so good!" I said to Berwald excitedly in a hushed whisper.

"This is a Sweet Shop. The things in the jars are jus' sugar. Ya can eat 'em. Like candy."

"Wow… but they're so pretty! They look like they must taste really good."

My Mother always told me off for eating too many candy bars. I always tried to create my own different flavours, as there were only two available back in Utopia. I often spread things on the candy bars like Jam, salt and crushed peanuts. It wasn't that great, but I enjoyed it though it was nothing in comparison to the sights on the shelves in front of me.

"Pick something." Berwald nodded toward the shelves.

"Berwald, no. I can't pay you yet! As much as I appreciate it, you have to stop buying things for me."

He just stared at me, expression unreadable.

"Choose some fer me then."

I rolled my eyes, but I was secretly delighted to let my eyes wander over all of the different kinds of sweets in the jars. I tried to pick out some that Berwald might like, but it was hard for I didn't know what they tasted like! Eventually I spotted some that I thought would suit Berwald. They were shaped like little diamonds, and were black in colour.

"What about those ones?"

I pointed them out, and he grunted in response giving a slight nod. He turned towards the boy behind the counter who came out to fetch the ladder.

"Hey Berwald. Who's your friend?" he said, and glanced at me as he passed smiling a little.

"Name's Tino. Tino this is Emil. Lukas' baby brother."

Emil's head whipped around to glare at Berwald.

"Don't call me his baby brother! I'm not a little kid anymore! Now, what sweets do you want?" The smile had vanished from his face as he leaned the ladder against the shelves and folded his arms right across his chest.

"Those ones please." I pointed out the ones that I had chosen for Berwald, and he climbed up the ladder to get them down.

"How many grams?" He asked as he hopped off the bottom rung of the ladder and sauntered back over to the counter. I froze when he asked me. Grams? What are grams? Thankfully, Berwald came to my rescue.

"150 please."

Emil nodded and took the jar behind the counter and poured them out into a metal dish. There were two dishes hanging from the scale on small chains. In the other dish he put in heavy pieces of metal and poured until they levelled out. Grams must be the unit that they use for weight here.

Emil's friend who he was chatting with earlier watched us silently, blowing a bubble every now and then with his gum.

"Leon what are you still doing here? Can't you see we have customers?"

Suddenly a man emerged from a door leading off into the back of the shop. Leon's bubblegum popped and stuck all over his face as he jumped at being addressed so suddenly. I couldn't help but laugh a little at his expense. Even Berwald smirked.

"Tha's the shop owner. Basch." Berwald leant down to my height and told me quietly while Leon was getting a lecture about hanging around in the shop, getting in the way of customers and distracting his employee. Though I nodded in acknoledgement I was a little confused as to why then shops name was "Lilli's" then, if the owner was a male called Basch.

Reluctantly, Leon took his weight off the counter, taking Emil's' hand and placing a kiss on it before he made his way to the door. Emil flushed beetroot red and froze up for a second, and Leon left with a spring in his step and a smug little grin on his face. I assumed that they were dating, or perhaps just started dating judging by Emil's reaction. Basch simply rolled his eyes.

"Emil I need you to go and take the mix from the barrels and start pouring them into the moulds. I'll be in to help you in a moment. You've wasted enough time this morning. Now go, before I dock your pay."

He seemed a little harsh, but nonetheless, Emil did as he was told and scurried off into the back room. Now that I thought about it, he wasn't like Lukas at all to say that they were brothers. Sure, Emil was obviously younger, but something about the way he carried himself was much different to Lukas.

My eyes slid away from watching Emil head into the back room when Basch began to walk over to Berwald and I.

"You must be Tino." he addressed me, much to my confusion.

"Oh, yes sir, I am."

"Berwald told me about your situation. I'd be happy to take you on here for part time employment."

I stared up at Berwald who just nodded at me.

"I knew Basch needed some help around here through Emil, and you know Emils brother. It helps to have connections around here, so get to know as many people as ya can." He said.

"You'll be starting tomorrow if you want for job. 9:00 sharp." Basch said as he looked behween me and Berwald.

"Thank you so much Mr. Basch, sir!" I was elated.

He held out his hand, which I gladly shook, thrilled at being able to work in such an interesting shop and being able to earn a living as soon as this. I had Berwald to owe for that.

We left the shop shortly after Basch handed Berwald his bag of sweets. The walk home was slow. We talked as we walked and Berwald unwrapped his sweets. 

"Berwald, I honestly don't know how to repay you for all you've done to help me out." I said as he popped a sweet into his mouth, but pulled a face and spat it out into the floor almost straight away. I stopped walking and doubled over in stitches from laughing at the face he made.

"It's not funny." He grumbled as I wiped tears from my eyes and stood up straight again.

"Was it not good?" I said in-between giggles.

"No. Tastes like… I don't even know what it tastes like. Here. Try one fer yerself."

I'd stopped laughing now and hesitantly took one from the bag. I popped it into my mouth and began to chew. It wasn't bad at all! It tasted like salt, and aneseed. I smiled up at Berwald triumphantly, my teeth and tongue black and sticky from the sweet.

"It's good! I like it!"

"Yer mad," Berwald chuckled as he tossed the bag at me. "Take 'em."

In thanks, I took a large handful and shoved them all into my mouth at once, earning another laugh from Berwald.

"But about me helping ya, you don't need to thank me. People round here help each other. Like I said it helps to know people. If you need anything, you might know someone who knows someone. People like to bargain out here too though, so jus' be careful that you don't become accidentally endebted to someone when you thought they were doing you a favour." He said, shoving his hands in his pockets and gazing ahead of us as he spoke.

"How do I know the difference between a bargain and a favour?" I asked, now a little hot under the collar at the thought that I was probably now several times in debt to Berwald.

He glanced at me and shook his head a little, "Don't worry, I've not conned ya. Usually if someone wants to bargain they ask what you can give em in return before even considering doing something for you. Fortunately if you stick with us we don't like to bargain."

When I questioned who 'us' was, he explained be meant the Vikings, and of course that seemed right. The Vikings were after all a group of people who risked their lives to help other exiles. If they chose to bargain with that, peoples very souls would essentially be being traded. 

I simply nodded and took another handful of sweets, chewing on them slowly in thought.

Though it sent my stomach in knots thinking about it, I could really get used to living here. I'd already found a good friend, a job, and got myself relatively settled in. I thought about what Berwald had said earlier about not missing life back in Utopia, and after the events of today, I was starting to agree with him. I longed to get a message to my family though, and my friends, to tell them I was okay. I remember how I had felt when I learned that Eduard had gone missing, then suddenly stopped walking, frozen in realisation. What if Eduard was here? What if this is where he had been this whole time? Exiled for some stupid reason. 

Berwald noticed I had stopped walking beside him and turned back to look at me over his shoulder.

"Everythin' okay?" He asked.

I took a breath and nodded, though the cold reality of what the perfect city I called home really was underneath the shiny chrome had hit me like a tonne of bricks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm so bad at ending chapters, sorry :')
> 
> I hope you're enjoying this so far! Thanks for reading x


	5. Chapter Four

Chapter Four:

I had now been a part of Menetti Village for just over a week. Settling in had been a little easier than I thought, but for the first few nights I had hardly slept a wink, forgetting where I was if I woke in the night. With my first pay cheque I had gotten myself some new bed sheets and stocked up on food. Basch paid pretty well, but my tasks at work were hard. All of the sweets were made by hand, as there was no-where to import from. Emil and I worked in the back, boiling the mixtures and then pouring them into the moulds. It was tough, especially when one of us had to leave to serve customers out front. 

I had become closer to Lukas, Mathias through Emil, and of course my neighbour Berwald too. In fact, as soon I was done with my shift today, I was going to go and train with them for the first time. I had managed to persuade Emil into talking to Lukas about letting me coming along with them, and he agreed. If there was anything I could do at the moment to take my mind off what my life had now become I was sure to give it a try. 

Last night just after sundown I couldn’t calm my thoughts and so I took a walk. The air had been cool outside compared to my stuffy hut, and after a while I found myself on the hillside, staring at the grey concrete walls of Utopia. They had looked even more ominous in the dusk light than they did in the daytime. From inside the city you hardly noticed them as it was such a big place, to house over 10 million people it had to be, and it was rare that you could see the walls unless you were on the outskirts. But then saying that, not many people had reason to go there. 

The reason that Utopia had come to be, or so they said, was the result of a great war that left the majority of the country in ruin and that the air was toxic as a result of chemical weaponry. There were gates in and out of Utopia through the walls, but they were guarded by the military at all times, and in my whole life I had never known or even heard of anyone that went beyond the walls. There were similar cities to Utopia all over the world, and although 10 million people may have seemed a lot, that was all that was left of our population. The rest of us were wiped out in the war and we’d been slowly increasing in numbers year by year as time went on. This war of course was long before I was born, even before my mother, grandparents and their grandparents. As far as we Utopians were concerned, there wasn’t anybody outside of the walls, and it was nothing but a barren wasteland. I even remember being shown pictures and videos of what was supposedly outside of our city when I was growing up, and it made me feel physically sick to think that it had all been a lie, a façade. 

Suddenly, I heard the bell above the door ring, signalling that someone had come into the shop and I realised how long I’d been stirring the same pot of molten sugar, staring down into it deep in thought. I looked over at Emil, who had just sat down to rest as we would be closing up soon. He shot me a tired glare, shook his head and stuck his thumbs down. It wasn’t hard to put two and two together and realise that he wasn’t getting up again, so I put down the moulds I was holding and headed out to the counter.

“Good afternoon, Sir.” I said as I greeted the blond gentleman who had come in, wiping my sticky hands on my apron. He approached the counter and handed me a flyer. 

“Good afternoon. I’m Ludwig, and I run the bar a few blocks down from here,” he gestured the direction of his bar with a jerk of his head, “Would you mind terribly if I asked you to hang this in your shop window?”

“Not at all!” I said with a smile. 

Looking down at the flyer as I took it, I saw that it was for a live music night, where anyone could play on stage for a small fee, and spectation was free.

“Thank you.” He said, then hesitated and let his eyes wander across the shelves behind me for a moment. “While I’m here, can I have 50 grams of mint imperials please?”  
Happy to oblige, I pulled the jar of mints down from the shelf and weighed them out. As Ludwig thanked me and paid for his purchase, he asked me to pass his regards on to Basch then took his leave. 

Once he’d left, I looked over the flyer in more detail as I began to hang it up in the window, I took note that it would take place every Thursday night for the next few weeks, starting tonight. 

The bell rang again, and this time Lukas came through the door. He was probably here to pick us up and take Emil and I to the training grounds, as he had a bow and arrows slung over his back and the shop would be closing in around ten minutes or so. He was wearing something a little different from his usual tunic style clothing. He wore knee high leather boots, the tops folded over with his trousers tucked in, a dark blue metal chest plate over a white shirt and fingerless brown leather gloves. He looked like he meant business, the soft and almost elf-like erethral quality that usually hung about him hidden away. 

“Hey Tino.” He said, closing the door gently behind him, “I see you’ve just found out about the music night that’s happening tonight.” He pointed to the flyer that now stood proudly in the window. 

“Yep!” I nodded, and began to untie my apron as I glanced at the clock above the door, it was 4pm already. 

“I think I might head down and see what it’s all about. If it’s anything like the music that plays in the village square then I’m up for staying until all hours.”  
Roderich and his band usually played for tips every day around 2 o’clock. Their music was so emotional and uplifting, and the instruments they used were so new to me too. I loved the sound that they made more than any of the electronic music that I used to listen to. Sometimes it drifted through into the shop if it was warm enough to have the door open, and Emil and I would hum along to our favourite tunes when they played them. 

“Yeah. It’s a good night out. We’ve attended for the past few years. You should come with us.” Lukas said and leaning against the shelving. I grabbed the broom and decided to give the shop floor a little sweep while Lukas and I talked.

“Oh, so it’s an annual thing? That sounds great!”

Emil came sauntering through from the back room. He had his satchel over his shoulder and looked ready to leave as he approached the front door and flipped the sign to ‘closed’. 

“What sounds great?” he asked.

“The music night down at the bar. Lukas was just telling me about it. Are you going too?” I said, setting the broom aside.

He shrugged. “Maybe. I went last year, but got fed up after an hour or so. Leon said that I could go round to his place instead and-”

“You’re skipping an evening out with your own family just so you can hang around with that kid? Just invite him too if you wanna spend time with him that badly.” Lukas interrupted, a frown now crossing his face. 

“You throw the word family around as if there’s a bunch of us. Not just you. You’re just my brother, not my family. I’ll do what I want.” Emil said with a huff and folded his arms across his chest.

Lukas blinked, looking a little hurt. “I consider everyone who is part of the Kinfolk to be our family, Emil. That means Mathias, Berwald, Alfred, Arthur, Matth-”  
“Oh will you just shut up, Lukas? No one needs family out here. We’re all outcasts. Freaks.”

Emil was beginning to get exasperated as he spat his words out, his grip tightening around the strap of his satchel turning his knuckles white. I didn’t know what to say. My gaze flickered between the two brothers as they stared at each other from across the room. Emil had a scowl plastered upon his face, and Lukas’ brows were drawn together in a look of sadness. 

Finally, Emil sighed. “Come on. Let’s just go. Mathias and Berwald will be waiting.” He said then tugged open the door and stepped outside, letting it slam closed behind him, causing me to flinch. Through the glass window in the little wooden door I could see him pacing away towards the training grounds, kicking up a cloud of dust behind him. Lukas was still leaning against the shelving, a faraway look on his face. He stood and gazed at the floor. I couldn’t read his expression, but following what just happened I left him alone. Besides, I didn’t know much about their family background. I had only been here a week after all. 

I collected the dirt that I had swept into a pile on the floor with the broom into a dustpan then tipped it into the trash can. Lukas looked up suddenly when he heard the clanging of the metal as I did so. 

“I just have to lock up now. Do you want to wait outside for me?” I said as I caught his eye.

He nodded and the bell above the door jingled as he left.

Quickly, I headed into the back room to put the dustpan away and grabbed my satchel slinging it over my shoulder. I had brought some bread rolls and filling for us all in case we got hungry later. Emil had told me that training was hard work, so I took it upon myself to bring something for them to eat when they finished. Taking the set of keys Basch had given me from my pocket I stepped outside to join Lukas. He watched me silently as I fiddled with locking the door and tapped his foot somewhat impatiently, then before turning away I tried the handle before and made sure it was locked. 

“Alright. I’m ready to go!” I said turning to face Lukas and sliding the keys back into my pocket.

He simply nodded and began to head off to the training grounds. I followed behind him with all kinds of thoughts running through my head. Was I actually going to get to try out with some of the weapons? I explained to Emil that that’s what I wanted to do, but if he explained to the Lukas or not, I wasn’t sure. I crossed my fingers behind my back as we walked. Weapons were forbidden back in Utopia, and I could only ever see them behind thick glass cases in the boring old museum. There was never really much information either, like where they came from or how they were used as if there was something we just weren’t being told. All I knew about them was that they were old, from the time before the great war. Here, outside of the walls, the weapons were available to touch, to hold and to learn about what they were all used for.

*

When we finally arrived at the training grounds I was straight away sent to go and sit in the wooden stalls surrounding the arena. Turns out Emil didn’t mention the part where I wanted to get my hands dirty after all. I slouched in the seat with my arms firmly across my chest, but I couldn’t stay annoyed for long as the atmosphere in the arena was incredible. Last time I came here with Berwald there were only a couple of people practising, but today it was almost like a tournament. When Emil said he was going training this is not what I thought he meant!

There were four different coloured flags flying high on wooden poles in each of the four corners of the field. One red, one yellow, one blue and one green. Then, scattered around the field were lots of thick wooden poles with a target painted on the front. There were also what looked like human shaped dummies lying around in various places on the field made from sacks of straw. I only recognised two of the people stood by the flags as I squinted to see as far down the field as I could, and they were Lukas and Mathias. Lukas was stood under the blue flag and Mathias under the red. Mathias was dressed very similarly to Lukas today, with the same leather boot and gloves, but he had a red chest plate rather than blue. 

Now I understood, these must be the groups that I had heard about. The first day that I arrived here I heard Mathias and Lukas talking about different groups of Vikings going out to search for exiles. I could only guess that these were said groups. Around four people stood behind Lukas, but seven or so stood behind Mathias. Both of them stood with rather stern or concentrated looks on their face, which was an odd sight to see on Mathias.

Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed another group of people emerged onto the field. As my gaze fell on them, I saw that they were all following someone with a yellow chest plate and heading towards the yellow flag. They all had their backs to me as they walked across the field so I couldn’t see their faces. I didn’t recognise anyone, or so I thought, and once they had all settled under their flag, I recognised the leader when he turned around. It was Leon, Emil’s friend from the shop a couple of days ago. His eyes flickered over to Lukas for a moment, and the two glared at each other. 

I shuffled forward on my seat and slung my arms over the wooden fencing infront of me as more and more people had started entering the stalls now. Most of the seats around me filled up and a light chatter now filled the air. An elderly woman took the empty seat beside me, catching my eye and smiling at me as she did so.  
The only flag that remained empty now was the green one, which was pretty much directly infront of me. I watched it flutter calmly in the breeze while I waited for something to happen. 

When I looked back to the field I saw that Emil had now emerged and was leading eight horses out onto the field, four at either side of him. Emil didn’t look at all strong, so the way he managed to handle eight horses on his own amazed me. They were all of different colours, some brown, some black, some grey and some a mix of two or three colours. There was a single white one though, and it stood out magnificently amongst the others. It looked familiar, and when Emil led the horses over to the blue flag, I realised why. It was the horse that Lukas had used to save me on the first day that I met him. He took the reins from Emil and took control of the horse, then swung himself onto its back in one smooth motion. Lukas looked almost regal a top his horse. He sat perfectly straight and kept the horse in perfect control with just small jerks and twists on the reins. 

Emil then proceeded to walk around to each of the flags, dropping off two horses for each group as he passed them. The leader of that group mounting one, and the other was tied to the flag pole. As he was doing so, I began to search the field for Berwald. More and more people were advancing onto the field with every passing minute, Lukas now had seven people stood behind him like everyone else, and it was becoming more crowded, but there was no Berwald and the green flag still remained empty.  
“Where’s Vihreä?” Emil was now stood by the green flag right infront of me with the remaining two horses. His question startled me, as I had lost myself in searching the field for Berwald and didn’t even notice him approach. 

“Vihreä?” I questioned, not quite understanding what he meant.

“Berwald’s group. They’re not here. Do you know where he is?” he said, rolling his eyes.

“Oh, no I don’t. I haven’t seen him today at all…” I bit my lip.

Emil sighed in exasperation and began to tie the two horses’ reins to the flag pole. 

“Well could you perhaps go see if you could find hi- Oh. You’re finally here.”

Emil looked over his shoulder as Berwald and his group approached behind him, his face free of his glasses, dressed in a green chest plate, and had a long sword slung over his back. Emil raised an eyebrow, like he was expecting something.

“Sorry to keep you waitin’.” Berwald mumbled apologetically and squirmed under Emil’s gaze. Although he was twice the size of everyone else, Berwald was so kind and gentle. But although he got embarrassed easily and was very quiet, I couldn’t help but get the feeling that Berwald could become very violent when provoked.

“Whatever. Just saddle up.” Emil said and put his hand on Berwald shoulder as he walked past. I watched his as he headed over to Lukas’ group and stood beside his horse.  
Berwald noticed me leaning over the arena barrier and shot me a glance, his eyes creasing and a small smile appeared on his lips as he shook his head in spite of Emil’s attitude before hoisting himself up onto his horse. Over the past week, I had grown rather fond of Berwald, and he and I had become friends. 

He cast his attention to the field before him and the rest of his group stood around him. I noticed that all of the other groups were in the same formation, and the second horse was currently without a rider. Lukas and Berwald exchanged glances as someone walked into the centre of the field and stood directly in the middle of the four groups at each corner. Tension grew thick in the air as he raised a megaphone to his mouth.

“Alright, Let’s hope there are no injuries this time,” he laughed a little as he spoke, but then his voice turned a little more solemn as he continued, “So, you all know the drill by now. The four leaders will take their turn first. Then second peer leaders be ready to mount your horse as soon as your leader returns to the group then third peer mount your leaders horse and so on.” Pausing for a moment, the spokesperson glanced around the field. I did the same and noticed that Mathias and Leon were now also mounted upon their horse.

“We seem good to go. Good luck everyone.” The spokesperson then retreated to the sidelines of the field and held up his right hand straight up in the air, his middle and index finger crossed over each other, and everything fell completely silent. Suddenly, everyone else in the arena, even the people in the stalls, did the same. I copied them although I didn’t really know what I was doing. We remained like that with one arm raised for about 30 seconds or so before a loud cannon fire scared the living daylight out of me. 

The field was now abruptly in chaos, though it seemed like organised chaos. Mathias and Lukas were alongside each other on their horses, hooves drumming into the grass, Lukas shooting an arrow or two at a wooden target as he passed, and Mathias swinging at them with a large battle axe. It was amazing to watch them as they barely held onto the horse as they did this, yet they stayed completely steady even though they were traveling at a fast pace. 

Berwald’s sword was still slung over his back however as he approached the straw dummies lay on the ground. He rode his horse with just one foot in the stirrup and was leaning down to pick up a dummy or two from where they were strewn across the field. His hands were dangerously close to the horses hooves and I couldn’t help but nervously sit on the edge of my seat when watching. He then jumped off the horse as it slowed and slung two of the dummies over his horse behind the saddle. Next, with a sudden swing of his sword he took the top clean off one of the target stumps that was just beside him. 

After a couple of minutes, Lukas, Leon, Mathias and Berwald returned to their flag and quickly dismounted their horse. The second horse that had been tied to the flag pole had now been mounted – I didn’t even notice from watching what was happening on the field – and the next four people set off to repeat what I had just seen. 

Berwald was out of breath and breathing heavily, beads of sweat forming on his forehead. I stood up again and leaned over the wooden fencing infront of me. 

“Berwald, that was amazing! I wasn’t expecting anything like that!”

He took his gloves off and dusted off his hands. They looked red and sore, which was probably from gripping the reins so tightly and using his hands so much even though there were restricted by the leather. 

“Mmm. It’s pretty unique how they do things.” he said, running a hand through his hair.

He leant back and let his back rest against the fence that I was leaning over. We just stood in silence and watched the others on the field. I looked at him out of the corner of my eye and watched as his eyes flickered across the field and I wondered how he could see what was happening without his glasses on. It was nice to be able to see his eyes and face without being shrouded behind the thin wire frames. Berwald made me feel like I fit in here, even if I had only been here a fraction of the time that he and everyone else had. 

Without realising, my full attention had been drawn away from the field to looking at him and I hadn’t noticed anything else that was going on around me until he suddenly inhaled a sharp breath and flinched a little, causing my gaze to snap back to the field. To my horror, someone was on the ground and their horse was completely uncontrollable above them. It was bucking and kicking and was beginning to startle the other three horses. I could only watch in shock, my body frozen as Emil suddenly came flying off his spooked horse as it kicked against the fencing surrounding the arena. He landed with a sickening thump, but scrambled quickly to his feet and rushed over to the person on the floor and began to help them up. Mathias then came running onto the field from the sidelines and began to chase after the two rouge horses. It was complete chaos, and I felt the sudden need to go in and help. People were fleeing from the field, leaving Emil to struggle with the injured person and Mathias to handle two spooked horses. 

Adrenaline surged through my body and I swung myself over the fence and ran onto the field. 

“Tino! Stop! What’re ya doing!?” Berwald bellowed from behind me, but I ignored him. My mind was torn and I had no idea who I was running to, but I kept going. I didn’t know anything about horses, but I figured once they were under control Emil would be just fine taking care of the person he currently held close to his chest protectively, so I ran towards one of the horses that was heading straight towards me. I stupidly screwed my eyes shut at the last minute, preparing for impact, and reached out my hand to grab the reins as it approached me. Astoundingly, I felt cool leather wrap around my hand and instinctively I yanked on it hard. Opening my eyes I saw that I had hold of the reins, and was now running alongside of the horse.

“Tino! Mount it! Mount it now!” Mathias shouted at me from across the field, his voice rasping. 

I was losing my energy fast, and the horse did not seem to be slowing down. Taking a deep breath, I leapt from the ground and wrapped my arms around the horses neck, bringing my knees up to stop my feet getting trampled by the horse and tried desperately to find the stirrups. Just as my arms were beginning to slip, I managed to shove my left foot into the stirrup. Now that I had my footing, I swung my other leg over the saddle and sat atop the horse. My muscles burned with the effort and it was terrifying being this high up on a horse that was traveling at such high speed. I could barely stay on! I took hold of more of the reins and tugged hard, and in a panic started to kick the horse hard, but which only made it go faster. 

“Hey, stop horse! Slow down!” I willed the horse, heart hammering in my chest. I tugged a little more, but in smaller, gentle motions this time and eventually the horse seemed to slow down. Feeling brave, I let go of the reins with one hand and stroked the horse a little. Then it slowed down considerably until it came to a complete stop. 

“Get off.” I looked around and I saw Lukas stood by me, his breathing heavy. He didn’t look at all happy even though I had just stopped his brother getting trampled. I unhooked my boots from the stirrups and slid off of the horse. Lukas then began to run his fingers softly over its sides and stomach. There were red marks from where I had kicked it. 

“Lukas, I-” I began, my heart still drummed hard and I could hear blood rushing around my ears.

“Save it. D’you have any idea how dangerous that was?” He interrupted me harshly, but didn’t turn to look at me. Instead he turned his attention to the horse’s mouth and started inspecting it. 

I blinked at him, stunned by both his response to my actions, but also by the fact that _I had just done that._ I had never seen let alone ridden a horse in my lifetime, yet something inside me seemed to come to life as I had made the split second decision to jump over the barrier and run into the arena, like a surge of electricity had shot down my spine, the same as I had felt the day I was snatched.

Not knowing what else to say or do I turned on my heel and began to walk away towards the exit. I stalked past Berwald and his group on my way out and he ran over to me. He put his hand on my shoulder and walked alongside me for a few strides.

“Tino… I… Hey, where ya going?” he said, his words faltering as he looked between me and Lukas.

“Home.” I shook his hand from my shoulder without even turning to look at him.

*

If this were a week or so ago I would have gone home and cried to my mother. She would give me a hug and tell me that they were just idiots, and that I shouldn’t listen to them. I’d give anything right now just to feel her soft jumper or smell her perfume again. Every passing day I worried about her and wondered what became of her. What if she was out here too? It was a possibility, yet I hadn’t even thought to look for her.

How long would it be before she forgot what I sounded like? And how would she imagine me to look in years to come?

I had lain down on my bed as soon as the door to my hut had slammed closed, hugged my pillow closer to my chest and just wept, finally letting out a weeks’ worth of anger, sadness and loss of hope that I had tried so hard to conceal. The world was now growing dark around me, and a gentle knocking at my door brought me from my thoughts, but I ignored it. I put my pillow over my face and clamped it over my ears. They knocked again a couple of times before stopping altogether. All was quiet for a few minutes, then suddenly the bed creaked and the mattress dipped as someone sat down beside me. I threw the pillow off of my face and onto the floor, glaring up through teary eyes at my intruder. It was Mathias. 

“I do live here you know. You can’t just walk into my house without my permission.” I said bitterly, wiping my eyes on my sleeve. 

“Everyone’s waiting for ya.” He stated simply. He sat with his hands in his lap, and I noticed that he looked a little smarter than usual. His hair was a little tamer and his clothes were neat. He wore a deep red dress shirt over black cotton trousers. 

“Waiting for me?” I said, my rage subsiding. 

He nodded. “We reserved a seat for you down at Ludwig’s bar. Lukas wants you to come and have a night out with us.”

I scoffed. “Oh he does, does he?” 

Mathias didn’t respond to that. He just looked down at the floor. I regretted saying what I said as soon as the words left my mouth. 

“He’s not a bad person you know. Jus’ kinda shy and doesn’t open up to people very well.” Mathias mumbled, his gaze not meeting mine. I sat up and moved a little closer to him.

“I know. I’m sorry.” I said, though I still didn’t agree with the way that Lukas had spoken to me.

“S’fine.” He turned to me and smiled, then stood up and stretched, 

“So are you coming?” 

Although I didn’t feel like seeing anyone at the moment, going out and enjoying myself would probably be the best thing rather than lay here and wallow in self-pity. I thought back to what Berwald had said to me during my first full day living as an exile of Utopia about keeping connections with people. Mathias and Lukas were the two strongest members of the Vikings, and leaders of a group too. I had a friend in Berwald, and I could go as far as to say that I had one in Emil too, what was the harm in at least trying to make a friend out of Mathias and Lukas too?

I picked my pillow up and tossed it back onto my bed.

“Fine, let’s go.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Welcome to chapter four! I hope this AU isn't too confusing and the storyline is somewhat clear up until now. This is one of my more ambitious fics, so I hope that it reads okay!
> 
> Thanks so much for reading, see you all in chapter 5 x


	6. Chapter Five

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello and welcome to chapter five. From now on, this fic will be written in 3rd person, because I don't know why I thought 1st person was a good idea. 
> 
> Eventually I plan to re-structure the first 4 chapters so they're also in 3rd person, but I don't have the willpower right now :')
> 
> SO this chapter might seem a little odd and honestly it's a pathetic excuse for an update but I'm trying to get into the rhythm of writing it in a different way. The plot has had to change a little as a result too lol. Currently this fic is written up to chapter 12 but the editing process has been a lengthy one. Please bare with me. 
> 
> Constructive criticism is _heavily_ encouraged for this fic, so please let me know if you have any comments or feedback. I know that this fic is a little more ambitious than my others and I'm unsure if the plot and storyline isn't too confusing for anyone who's not in my head, aka, me. I have such a love/hate relationship with this fic.
> 
> _Anyway, I hope you enjoy!_
> 
> _-lumassen x_

**Chapter Five:**

Berwald stooped as he stepped out of Tino’s hut as to not hit his head on the low frame and gently pulled the door closed behind him. The night hadn’t gone quite to plan, but he was thankful for the chance to spend time with Tino and the others all together. Tino had arrived at Ludwig’s Bar with Matthias not long after Lukas, Emil, Leon and Berwald had got there after their training session. It was a little awkward at first, as Tino was clearly still upset with Lukas for the way he’d spoken to him before he left the grounds, but once th drinks started flowing the tension eased. Berwald would be lying if he said that he wasn’t shocked that Tino’s small body contained as much strength as did to allow him to bring the horse to a stop earlier, especially with no training on how to handle a horse. He found that he was watching him all night for any other signs of hidden strengths or qualities that Tino might possess that could explain his exile.

It was the early hours of the morning now, and Berwald had carried Tino back home after one too many drinks. He’d mumbled nonsense to Berwald all the way home, and Berwald couldn’t help but feel sympathy for Tino as all of his worries about being away from his home back in Utopia and the unknown whereabouts of his mother came tumbling from his mouth as a result no doubt of the amount of alcohol he’d consumed. In the years that had passed since he was a citizen of Utopia it seemed like not much had changed judging by how Tino described it. Alcohol was still forbidden, and Tino’s first experience with it had been… messy. After he’d spewed his guts up round the back of the bar after stepping out for some air Berwald came outside to find him and decided it was time for them to leave. Tino could barely walk in a straight line and passed out pretty much as soon as Berwald had guided him toward his bed and helped him out of his vomit stained clothes, leaving him in just his underwear.

As Berwald had coaxed a rather intoxicated Tino into bed and placed a glass of water on his nightstand for him, he couldn’t help but think about how happy Tino had seemed that night before he hit his drunken peak and went spiralling down a hole of self-pity. He was singing along with Matthias at one point as if neither of them had a care in the world, but of course that was far from the truth even if for a few precious hours tonight it may well have been from an outsiders perspective.

Turning away from the door and stifling a yawn, Berwald’s ears pricked up as he heard a branch snap underfoot and he peered into the darkness at the growing glow of a lamplight approaching.

“Oh, Lukas.” he said as Lukas’s face came into view, illuminated by the warmth of the lantern.

Lukas lazily leaned his weight on one leg as he approached Berwald, stopping just in front of him and eying Tino’s clothes bundled in his arms. “What are you doing?”

Berwald shrugged and nodded toward the clothes, “Just takin’ these to wash for Tino.”

He began to saunter toward his hut and Lukas followed,

“Have you forgotten already what I told you?” Lukas chided, and Berwald stopped walking to turn and face him.

Lukas stepped closer to until he was just inches from Berwald. He was close enough that Berwald could feel the heat from the lantern against his neck. Then, Lukas sighed and lowered his voice.

“Look, I can see that you like him and you two are becoming good friends, but I advise you to keep away from him for your own good. It’ll be more painful when he passes before you than it will to stay away from him now.” He peered up into Berwald’s downcast face, and although Berwald knew that he was right and was only trying to keep Tino at arm’s length for both his and Tino’s sake it was still tough for him to hear.

“But you have Matthias, and Emil has Leon. Besides, you were the one who invited Tino tonight.” Berwald muttered, although he knew that his argument was pointless. 

Lukas was quiet for a few moments, clearly trying to think of something to say. He sighed and deflated against the wall of Tino’s hut, his brows knitted and his hard expression softened as he looked up to the sky and watched as the clouds crawled across the moon. Berwald followed his gaze and looked to the millions of stars that shone above them, all of them already dead before they even reached their eyes. Then, Lukas cleared his throat again and spoke still with his gaze cast upward.

“Leon isn’t like us. Eventually, he will die. Emil knows that, but he doesn’t want to believe it. Leon isn’t a bad kid, and I’m actually glad for Emil to have a friend in him. But I just wish that they would stay away from each other because I know it’ll break Emil when he loses him, and I can’t bear to see him go through that.” He paused and took in a breath. “That’s why I’m glad that I have you and Matthias. You should be glad of it too, as we’re all you have.” He turned to Berwald now and caught his eye. Berwald had spent enough of his life around Lukas to know what was meant by his strained expression, and that was that he blamed himself for Berwald’s loneliness as if Berwald hadn’t consented when Lukas pressed that small stone into his hand all those years ago.

Sighing heavily, Berwald’s grip tightened on Tino’s clothes. “We still have one stone left y’know…” he said cautiously, knowing how Lukas would probably react to the suggestion.  
Just as Berwald thought, Lukas pushed himself off the wall and lowered his arm so that the lantern cast its glow around their waists. Even now that his face was in the shadows, he knew that Lukas’s expression would be pained.

“Berwald, I can’t. I don’t know if I can trust him.” He said, then his voice dropped to little more than a whisper, “What if it happens all over again? You know what might happen when we use the last stone.”

Berwald nodded slowly, knowing exactly what horrible memories were currently flooding Lukas’s mind as the light from the lantern began to flicker at the tremble of his fingers.  
“But you saw the way that he handled that horse. I don’t think many people can do what he did without ever riding before. He might be the one that can help us- that can help _you_.” While they were already discussing what was a rather touchy subject, Berwald thought that he might as well say everything that he wanted to on the matter while he still had the confidence boost brought on by the beers he’d had.

“Well what about Emil? How can we ever explain to him that we chose Tino over Leon?” Lukas said, a growing exasperation to his tone, and Berwald was surprised that Lukas even considered it. Lukas constantly thought of the well-being of his brother and cared for him more than he did his own life. If there was something Lukas would refuse to do, it would be to hurt his little brother. 

“I dunno.” Was all Berwald could eventually say in response to that, “But soon Leon will begin to realise that Emil isn’t aging. And so will Tino with me. Plus, with all five stones used, you’ll be able to take down Utopia-” Berwald found that he was starting to sound pleading, and Lukas interrupted him,

“No. I would rather continue doing what we do, which is saving the exiles. We don’t need to interfere with Utopia. We should leave things as they are.” He raised the lantern again and I could once more see his eyes and warning expression. “Goodnight, Berwald.” 

With that, Lukas pulled his cloak tighter around himself and set off, leaving Berwald still clutching Tino’s bundle of clothes, his fist balled tightly around the fabric.

\-------------

Tino quickened his pace as he drew closer to the village on his way to work, painfully aware of how late he’d slept in. His head was splitting and couldn’t remember much about the night before or where his clothes had disappeared to. No wonder alcohol was forbidden in Utopia.

Fiddling with the strap of his satchel across his chest as he neared the square, Tino slowed down a little as he noticed just how many people were filling the streets this morning. Then there was a loud cheer and the sound of someone shouting. Curious, he followed the steady stream of people and when he rounded the corner he nearly ran into the back of someone. The square was packed full of people, all looking to a pair of men stood on the edge of the fountain so that they were elevated a little above the crowd. More and more people began to cram into the space and soon Tino was stuck within the gathering as more people had filled the space behind him, sandwiching him in.

“I say that they owe us! We’re all out here because of them!” the shorter of the two men stood on the fountain shouted, his voice raspy, and he held a clenched fist in the air as he spoke. 

“You call us Rebels, but we’re _all_ rebels whether we like it or not! We’re different, but we aren’t what they think we are! It makes me sick that there could be Fowls among this crowd and you don’t have the decency to step forward and give the Utopians what they want! We suffer because of you!” The other spat as he bellowed, his voice echoing through the square, and the crowd erupted and surged forward. Tino stumbled as someone shoved into the back of him, and the person he’d fallen into turned around elbowed him in the gut, winding him a little.

“Watch it, kid!” they sneered as Tino doubled over to get his breath back. 

He knew that eventually he would begin to see the cracks in the life that seemed so ideal to begin with, but in reality could never really work. Without a police force or some kind of government, the world outside the walls of Utopia was pretty much a free for all. For the most part, The Vikings were able to keep things relatively under control and were seen by a lot of the other exiles to be a slight form of authority.

The jeers of the crowd grew louder, and Tino began to get smothered by the people around him as they pushed and shoved. He was just about to duck to the floor and try to crawl his way out when a gunshot sounded and everything suddenly fell silent. Standing on his tiptoes and peering around the people in front of him, Tino spotted Matthias stood on the wall of the fountain, a gun pointed to the sky and the taller of the two speakers’ shirt collar in his grasp. He turned to the crowd,

“Don’t tell me that ya believe these punks? You think that that it’s anybody’s fault but the Utopians that we’re out here? Huh? Do ya?” he commanded the attention of the crowd, barely flinching as the guy who’s clothes he had balled in his fist hit him in an attempt to free himself. Tino couldn’t help but stare at the Matthias who stood before him who seemed like a different person to the Matthias’s who’d come to talk to him last night. Just as he let go of the speakers’ clothes and pushed him backwards into the fountain behind them, Tino felt a hand take hold of his wrist and began to pull him out from the crowd; who in their stunned silence parted to let them through. 

Once they reached the edge of the crowd and they turned down an alley way did Tino recognise who it was.

“Leon! I- Thank you, I don’t know how I ended up there!” Tino stammered.

“No problem. I didn’t pin you as the Rebel type, so I knew you probably wanted out.” Leon shrugged, turning on his heel and continuing down the alley. Tino followed, the pain from the jab in the stomach he’d received in the crowd dulling with each step.

“What were they talking about back there? What’s a Fowl?”

They weaved in and out of the narrow side streets until they reached a clearing at the edge of the village. It was considerably quieter out here, but the shouts and cries from the gathering in the square still carried on the wind as Tino and Leon sat on the grass.

“A Fowl is a half human half beast, said to be one of the reasons for the Great War.” Leon said as he picked at the blades of grass between his legs as he sat cross-legged and glanced at Tino through his bangs that had fallen over his face.

“You mean the war that Utopia was formed as a result of?” Tino asked, and Leon nodded.

“It’s a pretty well-known rumour, but of course no one is alive from those days and in Utopia you’re taught something entirely different. Apparently they had in-human capabilities, the Fowls, and there were others too who could control the elements. It sounds like a childish story to me, but many people believe it’s true as you’ve just seen.”

Leon tilted his head in the direction of the square, and although Tino didn’t really believe the rumour either, it did make some sense.

“So that’s why we’re out here? Because we’re different? Do the Utopian’s fear us?” he said, and Leon looked up at him.

“That’s my guess, but I don’t understand why they don’t just kill us. They obviously think our differences connect us to the Fowls or something. But I don't think they're scare, cause surely they wouldn’t risk letting us all live out here unless we served another purpose.”

That thought sent Tino’s head spinning, as he’d wondered the same thing himself. When he had first met Leon, he didn’t think much of him apart from the fact that he was a bit of a brat. But the more he’d gotten to know him over the course of his time out in Menetti his opinion had quickly changed. There was something about him that was different from the others, but Tino couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

“But back to what you said about the Utopian’s fearing the exiles. You say _us_ as if you know your reason for exile, and what they might have feared you for.” Leon continued, gazing at Tino with an expression that some might read as arrogance, but Tino could tell that he was just inquisitive. 

Tino shook his head and sighed in exasperation, 

“I feel like that’s the one question I’m never going to learn the answer to. What about you? What was yours?”

Leon laughed a little and lay back on the grass, his hands behind his head.

“I was born out here. I’ve never laid eyes on Utopia. This is the only world I’ve ever known.” He said, and Tino finally realised what it was about Leon that seemed different. He didn’t hate or resent Utopia like many of the exiles did, or long to go back there to find friends or family. 

Relaxing a little in Leon’s presence, Tino laid down next to him and watched as the clouds drifted by in the sky. He was already too late for work to dare showing his face now, and so he would go in tomorrow with some sort of excuse. As silence fell around them, Tino’s mind drifted back to what Leon had said about the Utopian’s having some sort of ulterior motive about keeping them out here. To many it was barely a life worth living, hanging between living and simply existing. 

“Do you ever wish that you were born in Utopia?” Tino asked, turning his head so that he was looking at Leon.

“Nope. Whatever is going on inside those walls, I don’t want any part of it.” he said, his eyes still closed and a vacant expression across his face.

Tino considered telling Leon about wanting to find his mother and Eduard, but the words died on his tongue as Leon closed his eyes and let the sun warm his face. Turning his attention back to the sky, Tino listened to the shouts that still carried on the wind couldn’t help but feel as though he was now suddenly part of something much bigger than he’d anticipated, especially if there was any truth in what Leon had just said about the Great War.


End file.
